The Simple Reason You Mustn’t End Your Life

A reason I lost sight of when I tried four years ago and one that’s kept me alive since

Photo by Hillie Chan on Unsplash

Disclaimer: This article contains multiple references to suicide. That might be a trigger for many. Please read with caution and close the tab if you feel uncomfortable.

I’m not someone who says suicide is not an option. Of course it is. If something’s within my power, it’s always an option. But with a caveat. Like you must never drink and drive or show up to an environmental protest with your banners in a plastic bag, you must never actually take the suicide option.

I tried, four years ago. And I almost tried, two years ago. The first time I was interrupted before I could cut too deep. The second time I’d made a pact and had the good sense to call the person before doing anything. They talked me down.

In the immediate aftermath of both events, I didn’t feel relief. That came later. At that moment I felt nothing. I wasn’t in a place to feel anything. It was in the weeks and months following that I realized the enormity of the mistake I’d almost made.

Irreversible

Death is irreversible. Once you die, you’re dead. There’s literally no going back. From my own experience and from those relayed to…